Thursday, January 15, 2009

30 Days to Getting Over the Dork You Used to Call Your Boyfriend: A Heartbreak Handbook by Clea Hantman


Is it the season of breakups?

More often than not, I've been counseling friends with broken hearts. No wonder so many made New Year's vows to seek another soulmate.

I'd also like to take a moment, for any friend-of-a-friends who are reading this, to mention that my ex is not a dork. My ex is a sweetheart.

Except when it comes to They Might Be Giants. Then she's a dork. :)

Well, awesome readers, dry your eyes and pick up the ILL form, cause Clea Hantman--aka Super Clea of LSL's much-touted Hey Day!--is here with 30 Days to Getting Over the Dork You Used to Call Your Boyfriend: A Heartbreak Handbook.

This tiny but powerful title promises that the sun will shine again, the pain will end, and you'll be singing a new song , Chiquitita. However, no wallowing is allowed. Each day has a new bit of hard-won advice and mission to get you moving and discovering bits of yourself, topped with a haiku and served with a song . Following the five stages of grieving, Clea starts you off writing the saga of your lost love. After you've committed it to memory, you're instructed to tear it into itty bitty pieces and toss it over your head. It's a slightly messy celebration of new things to come! What fun!

When you hit the anger chapter, you'll be doing yoga and turning that nasty break-up letter into kistchy paper jewelry. Bargaining for her love? Get your mind off the torrid past by learning to flirt, or making your own little "Love is..." posters to stick about. Depressed? Feng Shui your room, remake your wardrobe, and script your life as a movie starring you. Accepted that she's hit the road? Research your passions, chart a world tour-de-force, and then reward yourself for the last 30 days of growth and:

Do something silly and ridiculous and flirtatiously fun with your friends. Like, throw a congratulatory party with lots of meaningless pop songs and yummy snacks...Or mark this day by having you and your friends communicate only through song lyrics!...Or maybe you and your friends can hold an all-girl poker tournament at your house, and instead of money, you play with gummy bears...Or you could gather the girlies together to create a magazine about something or someone you love. And you can do it in one crazy, fun-filled night...Or you and your friends could all plant little flower gardens in your bike baskets and then go on a parade all around the neighborhood and all around town. Yes, it's absurd, and yes, it's silly, but that's the point.

By rewarding yourself with a fun activity, you're rewarding yourself with a rousing good memory, a wonderfully delicious memory. And like I've said before, the good feeling you get from that memory is something you can return to again and again.

This is a fantastically dynamic guide to duct-taping your heart back together, following warm advice with proactive activities to get you back into gear. You may not be totally over that dork, but you'll be well on your way to a happier, well-rounded existence. Fun, portable, cheap and full of good spirit, I totally recommend 30 Days to Getting Over the Dork... to all the newly-singletons who need a kick in the proverbial bottom.

*Clea Hantman blogs at SuperClea and Clea's Corner

*When your month is up, check out Holi-Dazed, a free book about weird holidays in the zine-y style of the much loved Hey, Day! I have the whole thing from the original website and adore it to bits.

*The Getting Over the Dork blog follows up on Clea's love of indie music, posting tracks to sigh to and scores for your moment of revelation that hey, you're just not into her (or him) either


*30 Days to Finding and Keeping Sassy Sidekicks and BFFs: A Friendship Field Guide is out on April 14. Sweet!

Life is just more fun with friends. And who doesn’t want a sidekick in case there’s ever a need to fight crime or solve a mystery? Every girl needs at least one wonderful pal, and when you harness the power of friendship, life’s possibilities can be limitless. It might sound like kid’s stuff, but the support of a girlfriend can last a lifetime. Long after the boys have come and gone, a true blue girlfriend will still be by your side.
But like it or not, friendships take work, plain and simple. And that’s where 30 Days to Finding and Keeping Sassy Sidekicks and BFFs comes in—a field guide to friendship that will help you learn the basics of meeting new friends and keeping the old.

* founder Bonnie Burton's list of things to do to repair a broken heart makes for good extracurriculars during your 30 days.

*Still stuck? Read Ask Nicole for advice about love, life, and everything in between, and if you're brave, submit your own query


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